Posts in Life
Lost in a Dream

To look back on all of this. This moment I’m in, this feeling I feel as I write this, this day. It’s just all a moment of impermanence; nothing more than a floating piece of dust through the air. But the fact I can trap it into this little capsule and share it makes me want to do it. I just can’t wait to look back at all of this a few years from now, when I’m on a total different path of life and in a total different mindset and realize that I was truly alive - I was truly present in all that my life was.

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here and there

There’s just something about traveling to a new state on a new road with sights I’ve never seen or heard of before that brings me the ultimate content. Every time I cross a state line I think to myself “You know, I really love it here”. Even if all I’ve seen is the road right in front of me and I’m passing by the welcome sign. I just love being somewhere new, with nothing but possibilities. When I’m standing on the border between here and there, it’s as though anything can happen or any wish can come true. I can be anybody I want to be for a day - and then when I’m tired of it I move on to something new. That’s why I love being on the road by myself and that’s why crossing new state lines maybe my favorite places in the world. Neither here or there, but the possibility of anywhere and everywhere.

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it feels so scary getting old..

It was 11PM and I could feel the warm humid air of Thailand kiss my cheeks as a slight breeze came through the nighttime

The sound of tokay geckos still echo in the back of my mind as I reflect on that night..

I was just laying there taking it all in..

I hit shuffle on my music and the first song to come on was Ribs by Lorde. A song I haven’t heard in years.. You know the one right?

I can feel the same goosebumps right now as I did in that moment as the song started to pick up.

As it changed from each verse.. until the goosebumps turned into slow rolling tears..

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Songkran.. The most cultural experience I’ve probably ever had. The moment I had been talking about my whole life without even knowing it. 

“I don’t want to go to college - I believe there’s so much more to witness and learn in life by just stepping out into it” 

That would always be my answer on why I don’t want to go to college. How there’s so much to experience in the world and so much to learn it’s all right in front of us. You just have to immerse yourself into a different world than you’ve known, a complete new place and a complete new surrounding of people/scenes. 

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40 HOURS OF TRAVEL // I'm in Thailand!

Honestly guys. Travel isn’t always rainbows and butterflies, it’s not always beautiful and easy. 

Everyone told me that going in and I believed them but what I didn’t know is that I would be experiencing it all within 4 hours of leaving my house. 

4 flights and 38 or 40 hours of travel, I was bound to get sick or something was suppose to go wrong. 

But my first flight from Seattle to LA - It hit me.

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A couple hours later I had no joke a 4 page list of things I would do if fear weren't a factor.. 

I saw myself running around the beautiful beaches of Thailand I once was suppose to go to 3 years ago.. A camera roll full of one in a lifetime adventures with my best friend.. A confident and fearless woman in the pursuit of happiness with life. I saw myself chasing dreams that once weren't left in my comfort zone.

The next question that kept replaying in my head:

What's holding you back?

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Can I just write to you?

Like sit down and be honest for awhile on what’s been going on lately. I feel I’ve been a little quiet lately. OR just more than usual. Maybe you didn’t even notice.

But my blog, my photos, my short films or vlogs`, my words/story telling. All of it. All of what I share here and on Instagram/Youtube means so much to me. It’s really my little corner of the world which I feel so humbled to have. And even more, people like you support me.

It’s been a creative block period lately though and I can’t hide it. Maybe it comes from my Thailand trip only being FOUR WEEKS AWAY NOW!? The snow here, working a lot, wanting to plan future travels. All the excuses whatever it may be, I just feel like I don’t have much to share about. Knowing life is going to be insane here in the next month.

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A NEW YEAR - What do I want to do?

It's scary to think about, if this really were the last year of your life.

But if you knew it ahead of time, would it make you change the way you approach life? Would you still live in fear or would you take that and run wild with it, by fitting in as much as you possibly can into one year?

I sat down at 3 in the morning last night and asked myself this question.
If this were my last year to live - What would I want to do?

So here it is.. Otherwise known as my goals. Because this year I'm living purely for myself and what makes my soul alive. Turning dreams into reality.

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LESSONS FROM 2018 // How To Live Before You Die

I want to start by saying thank you for those who have followed my adventures from 2018 into this new year!

2018 was without a doubt the hardest year I’ve ever went through.. But with every situation I came out with a new lesson learned and a stronger/wiser self. You see if I wouldn’t have went through all of that I wouldn’t be who I am today, I wouldn’t want to make decisions in life the way I do, I wouldn’t be doing what I’m doing this year and so many more opportunities that haven’t even happened yet wouldn’t being arising.

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